Lessons I Have Learned from the Moms in My Life

      Moms naturally give a great deal to their children.  When I consider the moms I have been privileged to have in my life, I have learned so much from them.   I think all of us have gleaned much from the mothers among us. 
       First, my mom taught me I was loved. Author and medical doctor Curt Thompson once said, “Everyone comes into the world as a baby looking for someone looking for them.” Thompson went on to say that “80% of the neurons in your brain as an infant need the interaction of another person to be fully activated.” At the core of each of us is the need to be loved.  Connection is health and life.  I enjoy watching our daughter interact with her one-year-old little girl.  She often says to her, “I see you.”  Outside of God, when we think about feeling seen, we think of mom.    
     Second, my wife, mother of our five children, taught me about the generosity of love.  She is a remarkable mother not only to our children but to others God puts in our path as well.  We fostered multiple children who were in a real season of difficulty in their young lives.  I’ll never forget taking in two small children ages two and three who came to us straight out of a meth house.  The beginning was incredibly rough but little by little our love, and particularly my wife’s generous love, made a difference.  I think for the first time they felt safe. That was a decade ago and we still have a relationship with those children, who are now teens.  In addition, we have hosted multiple college-aged friends of our older kids for whole summers.  My wife, Dellie, pours into these young adults in beautiful and substantial ways.  And Costco benefits from our expanded food bill as we feed the young men in particular! 
      Third, my mom and my wife both illustrate that a mother’s love is transformative.  Generally, moms offer us the closest thing to unconditional love that a human can pull off.  From this base of loving us as we are, a mom’s love refuses to leave us there.  A mother’s love is always calling her child forward:  whether it’s literally when a child is learning to walk or later in areas of struggle or weakness. It could be something as simple as following up on a task that a child is asked to do and making sure that the job is competed with excellence.  My wife Dellie is always teaching our kids to “finish the job well.”  That might mean making sure all the tools are put back in the shed or the counters are wiped down and clean.         
       Fourth, my mom, wife, daughter and daughter-in-law with children have all shown me the power of a smiling, laughing love.  Yes we should love our children but duty only takes you so far.  We get to love children and enjoy the people they are. Even at 80 years old, my mom lights up when I enter a room. My daughter-in-law can watch her small children do the same spin or maneuver over and over and thoroughly enjoy them.  Even while pregnant and at times exhausted, our daughter genuinely smiles at her one-year-old dancing and running to hand her a piece of cheese.  There is duty in love, but real, robust love includes delight.  The moms in my life have modeled that well.
      Today is Mother’s Day.  Be sure to thank and celebrate those moms who have given us so much.  Moms matter! 
Pastor Derek Dickinson
Journey Christian Church

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